As most of you probably know, I stopped updating my baby blog. It made me too sad, too depressed to think about how much crap I’ve been going through with my doctor’s offices to get my BP down (and they were failing). It made me feel like a bad mommy because for every day my BP is high, that’s one less day Zoe will get to grow inside of me before they need to take her later on. It’s a scary, scary thought. I packed up the stuff that the movers won’t be taking and came down to Charleston.

The past few days have been a harder climb than I ever thought I would have to face during all this. My medicine finally started working, I could rejoice! No sooner did it start working than it brought terrible side effects… pain all over, constant drowsiness and the need to sleep more, on top of headaches and increased heart rate.

Even though I’ll be fighting through this until I can see my new specialists at MUSC, tonight I came to terms with the fact that I really am grateful for being so blessed. When I flip over in pain, Zoe flips over inside of me, she likes to stay upright. When I am feeling sick and tired from my BP being low, Zoe is getting more blood circulation and feeling twice as good as she usually does. I would do this until September if I had to, for her. I think my best first mother’s day gift is a gift from Zoe… to know what the love for my child is already.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there… just remember how blessed you are.

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